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Geneseo Republic - Geneseo, IL
Thoughts on nature, culture, sports, faith, and life from a proud collector of random knowledge.
Adult Language
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By Greg Keller
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Dec. 5, 2012 11:51 a.m.



I remember somewhat vaguely that the introduction of TV ratings boxes when I was, I think, in high school. And, that brought about the discussion of why we referred to foul language as "adult" - with the contrarian view being that it it wasn't very "adult" (or "mature," being the other term often used) to talk that way.

Over the past couple of weeks, though, I think I had a peek into what real "Adult Language" is.

We bought two PowerBall draws when the contest reached its highest bounty. And, I was half-scared of winning the jackpot all by ourselves. Since we live in a state where lottery winners are required by law to be recognized, there wouldn't be any real "hiding," what with a listed phone number and address. We couldn't just live modestly for a couple of months and then escape to our mansion-in-waiting. I suppose the only real chance we would have had is if someone said, "Oh, you know, Greg's house is the one in the tornado-damage zone that has green siding now," because it seems like at least a half-dozen houses picked our shade of siding to do repairs.

But while I'd have figured out a way to "make do" with a half a billion dollars, a nice little scratch-off win would have been fine. And a couple of weeks ago, I came one digit away from winning $25,000.

What was the first thought that came to mind? "Wow, that could pay off my wife's car, or my truck."

That, my friends, is "Adult Language."

I've never considered myself an overly impractical person. I've always refrained from ponying up for the most expensive clothes or shoes or toys - perhaps more often out of actual resources at my disposal, but always saying "I don't need the fanciest stuff." I outwardly pined for a stripped-down, no-frills truck, and when the "opportunity" came in March to get a new vehicle (via an old vehicle that was dangerously overheating, and constantly), I got what I was looking for. No power locks, no power windows, not even a CD player. The last one burns me a little bit, but hey, it's just less stuff to eventually break on it, right?

But I know I really wasn't always practical. Probably wasn't practical for two guys to take off for Canada IN THE MONTH OF JANUARY during a short break of their senior year, no matter the justification of "because we're seniors and our group calls themselves "The Canadienz."

Probably wasn't practical to spend $700-800 of meager student worker funds to go on a hiking trip to the Grand Canyon in 2002, including $150 in hiking boots that I still have and are still in pretty good condition, because I've worn them about 10 or 15 times, max, since then.

Most likely wasn't practical to take a solo trip to Florida in 2003, considering it "research" for my novel in progress at the time. Of course, looking back, gas was only something like $1.85 at the time, so now, it looks like a steal.

I wouldn't trade those experiences for anything, not even the money they cost. I'm so glad I traveled and saw even small parts of our country and world when I could.

That said, the $25,000 scratch off miss wasn't the last. This weekend, I whiffed twice - again, within one digit on both occasions - on $25,000 prizes.

And, I didn't dream of some place warm, or exotic. Someplace where I could forget my troubles for a while, maybe bleach out what's left of my hair to cover up the grays.

Nope. Instead, it was, "Wow. That would've paid off our credit card and both cars, OR a car and the house!"

Adult language, indeed.

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