Dan D. Outdoors

Dan Dauw
Dale Kiser, Geneseo, was able to eliminate                                                                                          this wild beast before it physically attacked him.

Vole Attacked

Dale Kiser, Geneseo, was recently attacked by an extra-large vole (not mole) while working outside his home by Wolf Road. As the story goes, the sun had just set and Dale went outside to check his garden. Suddenly, he heard a screeching noise and a crazed, giant vole charged at him. Oddly enough, Dale just happened to have his Conceal Carry, .44 Magnum, and fired six rounds at it. It was stopped dead just inches from Dale’s head (C-photo). He used his John Deere tractor to haul it away. He thought about selling the vole’s fur, but the bullet holes ruined the hide. I guess it serves as a lesson to us all, “Beware of what lurks in one’s garden.”

50th Anniversary

Thank you to all you friends and relatives for attending our 50th wedding anniversary last Saturday. I think I counted 5 people in attendance which is more then I expected. Our two kids arranged the event, but I wished they would have mentioned in the invites, “gifts mandatory.” The Maple City Band provided the music, but only one musician, Lisa Depies, showed up, so it wasn’t quite their usual concert. The cake, while saved from the day of our wedding, was a tad stale. Several donation boxes were scattered throughout the reception room, and we received 38 cents so that was nice. Lorna looked beautiful, but since I was going fishing after the event, wearing my waders and life preserver was a bit tacky. Anyway, it was a lot of fun!

Cruise the Canal

This event is very popular and it is offered on four different dates. A nice way to see the beauty of the Hennepin Canal is by taking a guided tour while driving a two person golf cart. It is only $20.00 per person. The tour dates are August 14th, Sept 10th, Oct 8th, and Oct 9th. Tours depart at 9 and 11 a.m., and 1 p.m. You’ll leave at Lock 24, head west to Lock 26 and back. For more information go to: geneseo@geneseo.org or phone 309-944-2686.

Hunter Safety Course

The Rock Island Conservation Club will host a Hunter Safety Course this fall. It is very likely the class of 200 will be full so best get the registration in early. Note: Registration is by mail only. Good, it helps my pension!! Forms can be printed from the Rock Island Conservation Club’s website, or check with your local bait shop in RI County. All students must attend both classes, not just one! The two dates are: Thursday, Sept 9th from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m., and Saturday, Sept 11th from 7:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. As a reminder, I’ll try to mention this course again in August.

Humor

I admire those individuals who can do tasks using both arms. I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous. The reason the orange stopped halfway up the hill was because it just ran out of juice. Tina Holevoet once ran a successful flea circus. She started it from scratch. Larry Lord went to the doctor and told him that he thinks he’s a pack of cards! The doctor told him to just deal with it later. Before Meredith McNaught taught band, she was a history teacher. She asked one of her students, “Who shot Abraham Lincoln?” The young lad said, “It wasn’t me!” She later talked to the boy’s father about the episode. The dad said, “Well, my son is honest. If he said he didn’t shoot Lincoln then it wasn’t him! When I was in the Navy, I couldn’t play cards. The captain was standing on the deck. Lastly, how do you use an Egyptian doorbell? Easy! Just “toot and come in.” (Requires thinking. Most of you won’t get it!)